This is the second of our two-part series on issues divorcing parents discuss in mediation concerning college.
“Co-Parenting Once Your Child is Accepted”
Moving Your Child In: How is your child getting to school? Does he or she need you both? Do you want to be there together? Or if that’s too tense, is your child better off if you do this in shifts?
The Logistics of Everything Else: Who will run back to Bed Bath and Beyond when your daughter realizes that perfect pink pillow she ordered is missing? If you’re flying to a college, who rents the car? Who stays around to make sure your kid’s twenty duffel bags have arrived? Do you go home with your ex on the plane?
If Your Child Remains Homesick: Of course a period of adjustment is normal, but if after five or six months your daughter or son is still miserable, your ex and you should be able to plan together how to reach out them.
If Grades are Bad: This falls under the “My Child is having too much fun” category. You and your ex should present a united front when discussing with your child the need to “refocus” on his or her schoolwork.
Holidays: How much time does your child spend with each of you on his or her holidays? And summers? Of course with older children, their preferences usually prevail. But if there is a lot of tension between you and your spouse, you might want to agree on a mini-parenting plan, which you can “suggest” to your child.
Too Much of a Good Thing: Often children want to go off on trips during college breaks or as part of their studies: Is it okay for your child to spend a year aboard? Study Spanish in Latin America? Party in Fort Lauderdale? When and how do you as co-parents say “No!”
As we said in Part One of this series, you can’t anticipate all the decisions that you’ll make as parents of a child in college. But you and your Moncler outlet ex can forge a solid co-parenting relationship and learn to communicate constructively. So together, you can decide what to say when your son or daughter announces that they are joining the college skydiving team.
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